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Returning to Work
Sep 23, 2012

Returning to Work

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Yes, the sad day when I will be returning to work is rapidly approaching. I have to go back to work the first week of November.

Twelve weeks of maternity leave may seem like a lot but, it is not.

I know some of you may not appreciate me saying this but, I used to think that women who wanted to be stay at home moms were not ambitious.

I just could not understand why you would want to stay home with children instead of going to work. Well, now I know.

I have always been a work person. When I was salaried, I did not mind staying twelve or more hours a day.

I always thought even if I were really wealthy, I would always want to work. Things definitely change!

I love my job, but I cannot stand the thought of leaving my 3 month old infant in daycare. Dylan and I looked at our finances, and we decided we can afford for me to go back to work part-time.

Though I do not want to go back to work at all, I think part-time is a good compromise. Some women do not even have the luxury of being able to work part-time, so I guess I should feel fortunate.

We went to meet and interview our first daycare place today. We went to an at-home-daycare about three miles away form our apartment. The daycare is run by a very lovely woman and her two daughters.

The house was clean, and the people were very nice.  They are licensed, and they know infant CPR & first aide.  They live close.

Do I want to leave my daughter there? Absolutely not! I don’t want to leave her anywhere, but it will soon be time to face reality.

This is one of many times I really wish we lived near family.

I have been living across the country from my family for almost two years. First I was in Florida, and now I am in California.  They are scattered in the Midwest, and I do not think it has become any easier.

I may sound like a big baby, but it is really hard to be so far away from your family. Additionally, I am away from my best friend Amy.

If you truly have a best friend, you know they are absolutely not replaceable. Quality of friends is so much more important than quantity.

Going through my pregnancy without my family and my best friend was much harder than I would have anticipated. It is a good thing I have such a wonderful and supportive husband, or I am not sure how I would have made it through.

Do not get me wrong, I love Southern California. The weather is my idea of perfect, and I could not ask for much better scenery.

I will say the food is sorely lacking here though. I know I am biased, but Chicago really has the best food. Sometimes I just wish I could take everyone I love and bring them here to be with me.

Anyway, back to going back to work. I really wish we had family or close friends that were willing to look after Lily. It would be a whole lot easier to leave her with someone we love and trust.

We are going to visit a bunch of different daycare facilities to see which we like best.

Now I know what it is like to be a mother.  I have the utmost respect for stay at home moms.  I sincerely apologize for judging them in the past when I had no idea what it was like to have a child.

Being a mother is just the biggest, most wonderful blessing. I completely understand and respect why someone would want to stay at home with their child.

Did you have to go back to work after the birth of your children and if so, how did you deal with it?  What is your best advice?

 

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  • Jessica

    I was blessed by having the best sister in the world take care of my daughter when I had to go back to work!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/KareBear120603 Keri Atwood

    I am facing that issue to! It breaks my heart to think of leaving my child but we need to have money to pay the bills. Been finding little side jobs of babysitting and Nanny but its so far doesnt bring in the same money value amount of a real job.

  • http://www.facebook.com/ruth.a.telford Ruth Anne Telford

    I had 3 kids in 4 years. I experienced it all. I was a stay at home mom, I had a nanny when we were in West Africa for my 2nd son altho she mainly took care of my older son from 18 mos to 3. Then back to the US and reality! As a nurse I was able to work 3-11 pm and for the most my husband was with the kids. He was a grad student and lots of times we passed on the stairs going and coming. I am convinced there is no really good answer. When you are used to the satisfaction of being on a job and interacting with your fellow employees and the success of your work, you miss it! Then you look into that little face and say ‘I really want to stay home with her’. Ultimately, you make your peace with your decision. If you find a dedicated and kind day care provider (it sounds like the place you visited may be just that) ask if you can bring Lily for an hour or two and see how she reacts and how they are with her. If they say no, it’s not the right place. But then, you have to step back and let them work with her. Dylan’s mom was lucky that she had a home care person. Actually her daughter was born the same day as Emily in the same hospital. She was great with the kids. Good Luck! We’ll be right here on the blog waiting to see what happens. So enjoying your writing, Heather, being a whole country away from you. Hugs to Lily, you and big D.